Horrorfest 2024: Evil Ed

Evil Ed
Written by Anders Jacobsson, Göran Lundström and Christer Ohlsson
Directed by Anders Jacobsson
Starring Johan Rudebeck, Per Löfberg and Olof Rhodin
Sweden, 1995

A mild-mannered film editor (Johan Rudebeck) used to working on boring, black and white art films is drafted by the “splatter and gore” department of a movie studio to edit the sex and violence out of a popular slasher film series to make it suitable for European consumption. Tasked with working in isolation night and day on this, witnessing brutal scene after brutal scene, the editor slowly starts to lose his mind until he’s transformed into a murderous slasher himself.

Great premise, right? This is a fun and energetic slasher from Swedish filmmakers who clearly idolize the EVIL DEAD films, and why wouldn’t they? They’re among the best. This is fun and inventively shot, just like the EVIL DEAD movies, though it does sort of run out of steam in the back stretch, unlike the EVIL DEAD movies. The promise of the premise and the set up is more fun than the editor’s actual crazy rampage turns out to be, and part of this might be due to the fact that I saw the “Special Ed-ition”, so it may have been padded out with extra, previously cut, scenes. But, I’ve never seen the original version, so I don’t know for sure.

In any case, it doesn’t matter, because it’s still worth checking out. It’s cool to realize there’s still fun, weird, crazy stuff out there you haven’t seen, no matter how many horror movies you watch. Even if you watch 31 every October for 16 years.

Horrorfest 2024: Sisters

Sisters
Written by Brian De Palma and Louisa Rose
Directed by Brian De Palma
Starring Margot Kidder, Jennifer Salt, Charles Durning, Billy Finley and Lisle Wilson
USA, 1972

Slowly but surely I’m checking off my list of Brian De Palma films I still have to see, and this most recent one, SISTERS, is a doozy. I’d like to say never before has De Palma’s hitchock obsession been so clearly on display, but I feel like that’s almost always on display, so nevermind.

I’m not sure where to start with this story without giving it away, but the opening deals with a one-night stand between two participants in a voyeuristic hidden camera show – the “victim” of a prank (Lisle Wilson) and the model who’s “in on it” (Margot Kidder). Upon awakening the next morning, it becomes clear the model has a twin sister (who she’s arguing with off screen) and it is their birthday… so the one-night-stander goes out to get a birthday cake and comes home to murder!

Here the movie spins in an entirely new direction as it turns out a news reporter (Jennifer Salt, sporting her best KLUTE haircut) has been REAR WINDOW-ing from across the way and saw the whole thing go down. Unfortunately, the cops don’t believe her when the murderous model’s doctor ex-husband (Billy Finley) helps her cover it up.

The reporter hires a private investigator (Charles Durning) and the two of them set about conducting their own investigation to figure out just what’s going on here. Spoiler: you’ll never guess. It’s wacky and insane and worth the price of admission.

Even though I grew up crushing on Margot Kidder as Lois Lane, I haven’t seen much of her other work, so it was fun to see her here as a French Canadian in sort of a dual role where she gets to do a lot of crazy stuff.

This flick’s a fine example of De Palma’s usual obsessions – voyeurism, sex, murder, spit-screens, long takes, Hitchcock – so it fits right in with his extensive filmography and doesn’t disappoint at all.

Horrorfest 2024: I Was a Teenage Zombie

I Was a Teenage Zombie
Written by James Aviles Martin and George Seminara
Directed by John Elias Michalakis
Starring Michael Rubin, Steve McCoy, George Seminara and Robert C. Sabin
USA, 1987

Here’s a fun little low budget indie horror… I WAS A TEENAGE ZOMBIE. This is the kind of movie where I’d like to see a documentary about the making of it. Who made it? Why? How? It certainly seems like everyone was having fun. At one point someone namedrops Lloyd Kaufman but it doesn’t seem be a Troma movie… just a Troma-inspired movie.

I guess I bagged on the sound quality of THE WIZARD OF GORE earlier and I’m about to excuse the same here. Turns out, if the movie’s working, I can look the other way. Sure, TEENAGE ZOMBIE is clumsy and cheap and weird but it is charming in its own way. In a way something like THE WIZARD OF GORE isn’t.

Perhaps it’s the likable cast. They’re also seemingly amateurs, just like the GORE troupe, but they seem more ernest, more fun, like they’re having a good time, excited to be there. And that’s infectious.

The story concerns a drug deal gone wrong that results in a drug dealer (Steve McCoy) being dumped in a radioactive lake and returning as a zombie to seek his revenge. If there’s any flaw in this movie it’s that this set up takes too long and we don’t get to the teenage zombie of the title (Michael Rubin) until a little too late in the film. Once we get there, though, it’s gold.

Would you believe me if I tell you this movie actually has some legit pathos in it? You wouldn’t think so, would you? But there’s a sequence, perhaps bolstered by the great soundtrack, that features the titular teenage zombie pining after his lost love (Cassie Madden) that actually gets the feelings going. Of course it’s punctuated by a crude joke, but that almost makes it even more endearing.

It’s even kind of bittersweet and heartwarming at the end when the teenage zombie’s pals have to say goodbye to him. At that point I kind of didn’t want to say goodbye to him, either.

Horrorfest 2024: Gerald's Game

Gerald’s Game
Written by Mike Flanagan and Jeff Howard
Based on the novel by Stephen King
Directed by Mike Flanagan
Starring Carla Gugino, Bruce Greenwood, Carel Struycken, Henry Thomas and Kate Siegel
USA, 2017

It wouldn’t be Horrorfest without Stephen King, so let’s check out GERALD’S GAME, another flick I’ve been meaning to watch for years and only just now finally got around to.

I was intrigued by the premise – the whole thing taking place in the space of time a person is left chained to their bed. I like seemingly limited stories like this, stories that have to find unique and creative ways to open up the narrative.

In this case, a little went a long way. The story concerns a husband (Bruce Greenwood, one of my faves) and wife (Carla Gugino) who go to a remote cabin to rekindle their love. Things go quickly sideways when handcuffs and a heart attack enter the picture, leaving Greenwood dead on the floor and Gugino chained to the bed. How’s she gonna get out of this one?

That predicament actually sort of takes a backseat to the psychological drama that then proceeds to play out, represented by Bruce Greenwood and Carla Gugino playing mental projections of the husband and wife, aided along by flashbacks to the wife’s childhood. There are frequent reminders, however, how she’s going to need water, food, etc. Seemingly overly alarming reminders, to my mind, since, while it sucks to be thirsty, it’d take you a long time to actually be mentally or physically enfeebled by lack of water, which had me wondering how long of a period is this taking place over? It seems like within a few hours she’s about to thirst to death.

There’s also a fairly convoluted bit tacked on at the end which brings a coincidental, tangential serial killer into things, and had me scratching my head a little, but I guess that’s Stephen King for you.

 

Horrorfest 2024: Woman of the Hour

Woman of the Hour
Written by Ian McDonald
Directed by Anna Kendrick
Starring Anna Kendrick, Daniel Zovatto, Nicolette Robinson and Tony Hale
USA, 2024

Now for the second “based-on-a-true-story” flick of Horrorfest 2024, WOMAN OF THE HOUR, directed by its star, Anna Kendrick. This is the tale of the so-called “Dating Game Killer” – a serial killer who, incidental to his crimes, once appeared on the 70s game show… and WON.

Going in, I figured the entire story would be limited to the circumstances surrounding the killer’s (Daniel Zovatto) appearance on the game show, but the movie declares how intense it’s really going to be with a disturbing opening sequence that approaches one of the crimes with the same level of mastery and suspense as a classic like ZODIAC.

This does cause a bit of a flip-flopping tone, because the movie cuts between the killer’s past, present and future crimes, all around the central thrust of a struggling actress (Anna Kendrick) appearing opposite him on the Dating Game. The Dating Game sequences, while suspenseful and disturbing in their own right, seem like they’re from a totally different kind of movie than the flashbacks and flash forwards to the killer’s crimes. As a result, the movie’s a little uneven, but you have to admire the attempt, I think. It would have been too easy just to treat this thing like a joke.

Horrorfest 2024: The First Omen

The First Omen
Written by Tim Smith, Arkasha Stevenson and Keith Thomas
Directed by Arkasha Stevenson
Starring Nell Tiger Free, Tawfeek Barhom, Sônia Braga, Ralph Ineson and Billy Nighy
USA, 2024

Perhaps it was not a great idea to watch THE FIRST OMEN and APARTMENT 7A in the same day. One’s about how the Catholic church wants to breed a woman in order to give birth to the antichrist and the other’s about a bunch of devil worshippers who want to do pretty much the same. Of course, the Catholic church is doing it because they think not enough people believe in God anymore so what better way to convince them than to bring about the antichrist, and the devil worshippers are just doing it because they love Satan. But still.

As evidenced by my Horrorfest 2010 review, I’ve never been a big fan of THE OMEN, and perhaps part of the reason is because I don’t buy this plot. I guess in real life there are plots all the time that don’t make any sense, but they don’t make for great fiction. Like, how convoluted can you get – not enough people believe in God therefore you want to bring about the antichrist to convince them? It doesn’t follow. I spent the whole movie distracted by how the plot doesn’t make sense to me.

Whatever. The point is, there’s this nun (Nell Tiger Free) who’s shipped from America to Italy to watch over this orphanage and she starts to think a disturbed girl there (Nicole Sorace) is in some way being mistreated and she begins to unravel this conspiracy. She wants to rescue this girl, but the whole time I was driven to distraction what exactly she’s going to do with someone presumably carrying the antichrist… rescue her from the conspiracy and then… kill her? Thus, not rescuing her? Rescue her from the conspiracy and then let her have her antichrist and then… kill it? I was never clear on what they planned to do to stop this conspiracy. Maybe they weren’t sure either. I mean, it’s the antichrist, the Bible itself, written by God himself, says the antichrist’s coming. Good luck stopping It.

Incidentally, in a bigger picture sense, this movie and APARTMENT 7A also had me driven to distraction wondering what these all-powerful supernatural beings even need with humans in the first place. Like, you can do magic, why do you need a human woman to have a human baby for you? Like, what’s the deal there? It’s just funny to think about these magical beings needing to meddle in human affairs in order to get anthing done. Like, they’re relying on all these priests and nuns and nosey elderly couples in apartment buildings to do stuff for them? Why?

Anyway, is it any good? I dunno. This is the kind of movie where there’s two plot-device “surprise” car crashes and both of them are telegraphed in advance. You tell me.

 

Horrorfest 2024: Apartment 7A

Apartment 7A
Written by Natalie Erika James, Christian White and Skylar James
Directed by Natalie Erika James
Starring Julia Garner, Dianne Wiest, Jim Sturgess and Kevin McNally
USA, 2024

Before watching this prequel to ROSEMARY’S BABY, I chuckled at a Paste headline about it, something along the lines of “APARTMENT 7A imagines what it would be like if ROSEMARY’S BABY was bad.”

While that’s a brilliant headline, it’s not 100% accurate, because APARTMENT 7A has a couple moments worth noting. But in general, yes, it does fall into the trap where I kept going, “Yeah but later they had to do this all over again with Rosemary, so who cares.”

Normally I’m not the kind of guy who’s like, “What’s the point of a prequel, we know what’s going to happen.” That’s the same guy who goes, “What’s the point of TITANIC, we know it sinks.” No shit. What’s the point of any movie ever? As Aerosmith once said, life’s a journey, not a destination. In theory, any story’s worth telling as long as it keeps you entertained in one way or another.

That’s the biggest failing of this one, the tale of the girl who came before Rosemary – it’s boring. We learn this one’s a struggling dancer (Julia Garner) trying to make it on Broadway. She’s injured and suffers a setback, and a seemingly-kindly (if busy-body-ish) old couple (Diane Wiest and Kevin McNally) give her a place to stay in a building that just so happens to also house the very guy she wants to get in good with in order to “make it” (Jim Sturgess). Turns out they’re all devil worshippers using her as a vessel to give birth to the son of satan, though. Whoops!

The movie assumed I had more familiarity with ROSEMARY’S BABY than I do, so if you plan to watch it, I recommend re-watching ROSEMARY’S BABY either right before it, or right after it, to refresh yourself. I haven’t seen it in like 20 years or something so I missed out on a bunch of the moments where I was supposed to go, “Ohhhh!” 

I said earlier there are a couple moments that are worth it and one of them is towards the end. Without giving too much away there's a moment where our heroine decides the only way to be the master of her own destiny and the last thing she's going to do with her life is to dance. That dance may have been conceived in an attempt to try for a M3GAN or WEDNESDAY meme, and if that's the case, the movie failed. But, if they wanted one, solid, memorable, unique scene: they succeeded.

Horrorfest 2024: The Woman in Black

The Woman in Black
Written by Jane Goldman
Based on the novel by Susan Hill
Directed by James Watkins
Starring Daniel Radcliffe, Ciarán Hinds, Janet McTeer and Liz White
UK/USA/Sweden/Canada, 2012

It’s always nice to see a Hammer film during Horrorfest and this year I’m taking a look at one of the flick’s from Hammer’s recent revival, THE WOMAN IN BLACK. It fits nicely right alongside all the classics, and does haunted houses better than Guillermo Del Toro’s attempt from a few years later, CRIMSON PEAK.

This one stars Daniel Radcliffe as a widowed father who’s short on cash and in the doghouse at his law firm in turn-of-the-century London. He’s dispatched to the remote estate of its recently deceased owner to collect any documents that might figure in a last will and testament. We know we’re off to a good start in Hammer-land when he arrives at the local pub/inn only to get a super cold shoulder from the locals, who emphatically try to prevent him from completing his task. Classic.

Turns out, the estate’s haunted, and it’s up to this lawyer to figure out what’s going on and put the haunting to rest before his 4-year-old son and nanny show up, because it seems this particular haunting manifests itself iin a Woman in Black who causes village children to become hypnotized into causing their own deaths.

I liked how Radcliffe teams up with the only local who will give him the time of day (Ciaran Hinds) and takes charge in trying to figure everything out as the clock keeps ticking. The movie moves swiftly to a bittersweet and perhaps inevitable ending that had me on the edge of my seat.

I haven’t heard either great things or bad ones about this unassuming and already semi-forgotten little flick, but I couldn’t recommend it more highly.

 

Horrorfest 2024: The Town That Dreaded Sundown

The Town that Dreaded Sundown
Written by Earl E. Smith
Directed by Charles B. Pierce
Starring Ben Johnson, Andrew Prine and Dawn Wells
USA, 1976

Infamous as either the first slasher or a proto-slasher, depending who you ask, I’ve been meaning to check out THE TOWN THAT DREADED SUNDOWN for years. Loosely based on real murders in Texarkana in 1946, the movie starts out promising grim realism as a detached narrator (Vern Stierman) dispassionately sets the tone against meticulously detailed period sets, costumes and vehicles.

So, this was all promising, but the movie goes off the rails when law enforcement gets involved. Then we’re suddenly treated to slapstick comedy routines set to the kind of music that says, “Hey, pay attention, this is supposed to be funny.” I’m not against comedy relief in horror flicks – some of the best horror movies seamlessly blend horror and comedy and are better for it – but this was so cartoonishly bad as to render the rest of the movie pretty inconsequential. Which is unfortunate, when you’re playing the “based on a true story” card. 

On the bright side, Dawn Wells makes an appearance. On the not-so-bright-side, it’s only for a couple minutes.

 

Horrorfest 2024: The Wizard of Gore

The Wizard of Gore
Written by Allen Kahn
Directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis
Starring Ray Sager, Judy Cler and Wayne Ratay
USA, 1970 

It seems like almost every year for Horrorfest there’s at least one movie that’s only worth watching so you can say you’ve seen it. This year THE WIZARD OF GORE is that movie.

Director Herschell Gordon Lewis, known for his low-budget gore fests, has a cult following, but I was never in the cult and this movie didn’t convince me. Still, any movie nerd who doesn’t want to have to surrender their Movie Nerd credentials should probably check this one out so they’re not lying when they say they’ve seen it.

THE WIZARD OF GORE is probably the most famous of Lewis’ flicks and I suppose that might be because it is the most accessible, but watching it I gotta say… it’s not very accessible. I’m no budget snob but the lack of budget is on display in every scene here, showcased mostly in bad sound. Honestly, I could forgive bad gore effects, bad acting and even bad cinematography if I could just understand what everyone’s saying.

What’s the movie about? Well, I guess there’s this magician (Ray Sager) who specializes in especially gory tricks – like, when he saws a woman in half, he really saws her in half with a chainsaw and her guts fall out right in front of the audience. Where’s the trick, you ask? Well, seemingly magically, right after this display the woman in question looks fine and gets up and walks away. The problem is, later on, the women who volunteer for these tricks turn up dead later, suffering the same wounds they suffered on stage. 

The host of a local daytime talk show (Judy Cler) puts two and two together and figures the magician is somehow responsible for these deaths, setting out to figure out how and bring him down. The investigation is eventually sidelined in favor of an ending that revolves around questioning reality

The main event here is the gore stuff, I think, which is not that great, though I suppose it was probably shocking in 1970, if anyone ever even saw this.

Horrorfest 2024: Terror Train

Terror Train
Written by T.Y. Drake
Directed by Roger Spottiswoode
Starring Jamie Lee Curtis, Ben Johnson, Hart Bochner and David Copperfield
USA/Canada, 1980

It wouldn’t be horrorfest without at least one icon and this year it’s going to be scream-queen Jamie Lee Curtis in TERROR TRAIN.

The movie starts out on unsteady footing as a group of college kids stage a prank that seemingly leads to one kid being so traumatized, he ends up committed. This prank involves a dead body, which I think sinks the entire thing immediately. I’m supposed to empathize with Jamie Lee Curtis, who was peer pressured into participating in this prank, and who ultimately regrets it, but a dead body? That’s too far. That takes it way outside the realm of “normal” college prank, nevermind the fact the prank is also sex-based, which is bad enough.

You might be wondering what any of this has to do with a train, and it doesn’t, really. But, three years later, all these college kids end up on a party train of sorts for their New Years Eve bash. A mysterious killer is also on board the train, hence the terror, and it quickly becomes apparent that the victim of this prank from the beginning of the film is back and looking for revenge.

Eagle eyes will spot the name “David Copperfield” in the credits and sure enough, here he is, in all his glory, playing… a magician! He wows the kids with sleight of hand and becomes a prime suspect. But we all know he’s not guilty of anything, except making the Statue of Liberty disappear. But that was years later and this isn’t MINORITY REPORT.

I’ve seen Jamie Lee Curtis in several horror movies by this point, including several slashers, and I gotta say, so far, this one’s the worst. It doesn’t make very good use of the train setting and ultimately commits one of the worst sins of any movie, let alone a slasher: it’s boring.

Horrorfest 2024: Starry Eyes

Starry Eyes
Written and Directed by Kevin Kölsch and Dennis Widmyer
Starring Alexandra Essoe, Amanda Fuller and Noah Segan
USA, 2014

STARRY EYES is the third film of Horrorfest 2024 dealing with a woman in the entertainment industry’s self-doubt, negative body image, and insecurity, using supernatural or sci-fi means to dramatize how these issues eat away at people.

Alexandra Essoe stars in this low budget indie as a struggling actress who works at a Hooters-esque restaurant by day and gets rejected at auditions by night, until she passes on a chance to sleep her way into a role and then regrets it. After all, if it could give her the life she’s always wanted, isn’t it worth it?

Turns out no, as this particular movie producer seems to be in some sort of devil worshipping cult, and the repurcussions of this young actress’s literal deal with the devil begin to manifest in her body and mind falling apart, to the point where she becomes a danger to herself and her circle of friends.

The movie’s as engrossing as it is gross, and despite its supernatural elements has a realism to it that is lacking from many slicker productions. The lead actress here seems like a real person, so it’s all the more horrific to see what happens to her.

Horrorfest 2024: Abigail

Abigail
Written by Stephen Shields and Guy Busick
Directed by Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett
Starring Melissa Barrera, Dan Stevens, Alisha Weir and Giancarlo Esposito
USA, 2024

The trailer for ABIGAIL looked like yet another young girl ballerina turned assassin movie, which you’d think would be rare but seems ubiquitous. Imagine my delight when I found out this particular young girl is a vampire, so it’s okay for her to have superpowers.

The young girl in question is actually a couple hundred years old, like that perv in TWLIGHT, and, as played by Alisha Weir, uses her little girl image to get sympathy out of her would-be captors before chowing down on them.

The captors in question are a group of mercenaries hired by an enigmatic boss (Giancarlo Esposito) and lead by SCREAM queen Melissa Barrera and handsome Dan Stevens, who is always at his best in horror movies.

In this film the set up is better than the payoff as the suspenseful caper-and-character-driven opening gives way to endless fights that go on too long. But it's better than your average young ballerina assassin flick.

Horrorfest 2024: Smile 2

Smile 2
Written and Directed by Parker Finn
Starring Naomi Scott, Rosemarie DeWitt and Lukas Gage
USA, 2024

Last year, the original SMILE surprised me by having more to it than its premise seemed to suggest, but let me down with an ending less original than the film that came before it. This year, SMILE 2 continues that tradition, though it might be even better than the original.

The “entity” in the SMILE movies that gets into the characters’ heads works as an allegory for mental illness, self-doubt, low self esteem – basically, all the negative stories we tell ourselves that make ourselves miserable. In that sense, this monster is more frightening and easy to relate to than many other horror monsters. The genius of these movies is that they could probably work as just character studies – the horror story is just the icing on the cake.

SMILE 2, being about a young pop star recovering from a very public and embarrassing substance abuse issue and embarking on her redemption tour, is even more about all this internal mind stuff than the original. What a perfect character and circumstance to use to show the dangers of your mind being poisoned against itself.

There’s a bit of convoluted storytelling at the beginning of the movie as it features a car-crash, and then the main character’s backstory also involves a car-crash – turns out these are two separate car crashes. Go figure. Also, the movie doesn’t end quite the way I would have liked, though it does set itself up for a big epic part three, so it has that going for it. Which is nice. 

Those little nitpicks don’t really matter, though, because Naomi Scott nails the lead performance, going above and beyond and through the full range of mania, fear, cringe and mental breakdown. If the Academy took horror movies seriously, she’d be nominated for best actress. But they don’t, so she won’t.

 

Horrorfest 2024: Split

Split
Written and Directed by M. Night Shyamalan
Starring James McAvoy, Anya Taylor-Joy and Betty Buckley
USA, 2017

In my continuing quest to catch up on all the M. Night Shyamalan flicks I’ve missed over the years, I checked out SPLIT the other day, making me probably the only guy on the planet who saw UNBREAKABLE and GLASS first.

SPLIT tells the story of a man with multiple personalities – 23 of them, in fact – who physically manifests the traits of these personalities as he assumes them. For example, one personality has diabetes, the others don’t. One is a super-human, murderous beast, the others aren’t. That kind of thing.

This is bad news for Anya Taylor-Joy and her pals who are kidnapped by this guy’s serial killer personality from a mall birthday party and placed in a cell. It’s good news for James McAvoy, who plays this guy and gets the chance to act the shit out of it. Why play one character when you can play 23?

This Shymalan joint is not as bad as his duds and doesn’t reach the heights of his classics. There is some needlessly confusing and convoluted stuff involving flashbacks for Anya Taylor-Joy’s character, but it’s a good enough flick that unfolds in unexpected ways and is worth watching if only for McAvoy’s insane performance(s). 

Horrorfest 2024: Mama

Mama
Written by Neil Cross, Andy Muschietti and Barbara Muschietti
Directed by Andy Muschietti
Starring Jessica Chastain and Daniel Kash
Canada/Spain/Mexico, 2013

It seems like a theme of Horrorfest 2024 is that bad CGI makes what could be a good horror movie a less-good horror movie, and MAMA is a perfect example of that. 

Jessica Chastain stars as the unlikely adopted mother of a couple little girls who survived an attempted family-annihilation and inexplicably hid out in a cabin for years. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is on hand as a doctor who suspects something supernatural might be going on. The younger girl is basically feral, having grown up in the wild, and the other is slightly less feral, having some basic memories of life before the cabin. Both, however, seem enthralled by a presence known only as “Mama,” a creature who we suspect took care of the girls all those years as the adults in the flick try to figure stuff out.

The problems with the CGI come via Mama, a creature who might have been a triumph of art direction if it wasn’t rendered by unconvincing and shoddy effects that rob a lot of the most important scenes of the emotional weight (and scares) they deserve. It’s an interesting premise, lacking in the execution.

It’s nice to see Chastain playing somewhat against type here as a short-haired, tatted-up bassist in a rock band who only reluctantly ends up taking care of these girls by chance. But that’s not enough to save the movie from itself.

Horrorfest 2024: Trick 'r Treat

Trick 'r Treat
Written and Directed by Michael Dougherty
Starring Dylan Baker, Rochelle Aytes, Anna Paquin and Brian Cox
USA, 2009

TRICK 'R TREAT is one of those movies renowned for the way it found a cult audience without being a big hit in theaters. Whenever that happens, you have to wonder, do people love it out of proportion because they perceive it as their own discovery, as opposed to something spoonfed to them? Or, is the love totally in proportion to how great the movie actually is?

As usual, what we have here, is a middle-of-the-road that is looked upon more fondly than most because people see it as their own. And, hey – that’s better than either not getting discovered at all or being a bad movie. But, a classic this does not make.

In any case, we’ve got sort of an anthology film here, exploring several different stories and characters on one Halloween evening. I say sort of because they’re not self contained episodes – like PULP FICTION before it, TRICK ‘R TREAT features stories that overlap and twist in and out of each other in unexpected (and expected) ways, as the movie hops back and forth in time to give us the full picture of the spooky happenings one night, all revolving around a creepy little bag-headed trick-or-treater the internet tells me is named Sam.

The internet also tells me Sam shows up whenever any of the characters break any of the traditions of Halloween. Thing is, these characters know way more Halloween-related traditions than I do. The ones I know about are… dressing up in costumes and… trick or treating. So there’s two. Apparently there’s a bunch of other ones. Who knew? Everyone in this movie, I guess.

We’ve got Anna Paquin as the virginal member of a group of party girls who are not what they seem, Dylan Baker as a twisted serial killer and Brian Cox as a reclusive grump who may or may not figure in to the tragic history of a school bus crash infamous in the history of this fictional, Halloween-loving, small town.

Is the movie greater than the sum of its parts? Not really. There are moments that shine, like a grotesque transformation sequence in which women shed their skin to reveal they’re actually werewolves. This is not only a cool take on werewolf transformation, but also effectively rendered with fun, gross and believable special effects. But, there are also long stretches that bring on the snores like when a group of kids goes to a graveyard to do something, I dunno. Wake me up when Brian Cox shows up again.

 

Horrorfest 2024: Insidious

Insidious
Written by Leigh Whannell
Directed by James Wan
Starring Patrick Wilson, Rose Byrne, Barbara Hershey, Lin Shaye and Ty Simpkins
Canada/USA/UK, 2011

I’ll never learn. I put off watching INSIDIOUS for years, assuming it must suck if it’s a big budget, slick, Hollywood take on horror. Turns out now that I’ve finally checked it out it’s pretty good, if you don’t count the ending, which is good for the bean counters because it led to lots of sequels, but less good for me because it seemed like a cop out.

Like many haunted house movies before it, this is the tale of a family moving into their new home. Things go bump in the night and before you know it one of their kids (Ty Simpkins) is in an inexplicable coma. Mom (Rose Byrne) begins to think something supernatural’s going on but dad (Patrick Wilson) is pretending to work late so he doesn’t have to deal with it.

As things unfold we learn there’s more to dad than meets the eye, as his mother (Barbara Hershey) and the medium they call in for help (Lin Shaye) harbor secrets from his past.

The movie picks up when Lin Shaye enters, commanding the screen as The Woman Who Knows What’s Going On, complete with a couple of bumbling sidekicks played by the film’s writer and director, respectively. While she’s been in roughly six thousand films, I don’t think Lin Shaye gets the respect she deserves as a character actor, here given an almost-starring role and chance after chance to steal scenes, all of which she takes.

I mentioned before the ending bummed me out, and honestly I’m not sure why. I like plenty of movies with ambiguous endings, cliffhangers or even ones where the bad guys win. Why’s it seem cheap in this movie, to me? I don’t know, check it out and see if it seems cheap to you.

Sidenote, I liked the use of TIPTOE THROUGH THE TULIPS in this flick because that song is certified scary.

Horrorfest 2024: We Are Still Here

We Are Still Here
Written and Directed by Ted Geoghegan
Starring Barbara Crampton, Andrew Sensenig, Larry Fessenden and Lisa Marie
USA, 2015

A couple grieving the loss of their son move into an old house in the New England countryside in an attempt to start a new life in WE ARE STILL HERE, a low budget hit-and-miss ghost flick.

No sooner do they move in than the grieving mother (Barbara Crampton) starts sensing a presence and assumes it is the spirit of her dead teenage son. Dad (Andrew Sensenig) is not so sure, but it’s too late, because their wacky spiritualist buddies (Larry Fessenden and Lisa “Vampira” Marie) are on their way to check things out.

Meanwhile, the townsfolk are creeps who keep alluding to something sinister going on in the house, and it isn’t long before they’ve got their pitchforks and have our heroes surrounded. Turns out, the presence in the house may not be the dead teen. OR IS IT? 

This movie does a lot with a little but doesn’t really tread any new ground. So, while it’s an impressive low budget yarn, and a good way to spend an evening when you’re trying to watch 31 horror movies in 31 days, there’s not a ton to recommend it.

 

Horrorfest 2024: Terrifier 3

Terrifier 3
Written and Directed by Damien Leone
Starring Lauren LaVera, David Howard Thornton and Elliott Fullam
USA, 2024

Art the clown (David Howard Thornton) is back, and this time it’s Christmas! Welcome to TERRIFIER 3, which is 3x as gross as TERRIFIER and TERRIFIER 2 – but mercifully shorter than its predecessor. At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old man, here’s a quick note to people who make slasher movies – bring ‘em in at 90 minutes, okay?

TERRIFIER 3 is a lot of more of the same, only possibly more artfully (get it?) shot than the first two, as Art the clown continues his kill-crazy (and increasingly supernatural) rampage and the heroes introduced in the second flick (Lauren LaVera and Elliott Fullam) continue to try to stop him. This time around, they have PTSD from the last time around. Character development!

I was sort of hoping this would be the climactic finale of the low budget, high-grossing series or, if not, maybe add something new to the tale. Instead, we’re left with a cliffhanger in a movie that’s mostly just treading water (or blood).

As usual, David Howard Thornton’s performance as the clown is the best thing in the movie, and makes for the first legit new slasher villain that’ll stand the test of time since, like… SCREAM, maybe? But even he’s given less to do. After a great opening sequence his antics, while brutal, lack his usual flair. Also, while having characters we could care about as a novel edition to TERRIFIER 2, recycling the same ones in the same situations with the same resolutions in TERRIFIER 3 is boring.

Will I go see TERRIFIER 4? Yes. Do I have to like it? That’s up to Damien Leone!

 

Horrorfest 2024: Crimson Peak

Crimson Peak
Written by Guillermo del Toro and Matthew Robbins
Directed by Guillermo del Toro
Starring Mia Wasikowska, Jessica Chastain, Tom Hiddleston and Charlie Hunnam
USA/Mexico/Canada, 2015

I skipped Guillermo del Toro’s take on ghost flicks, CRIMSON PEAK, back in 2015 when it originally came out, but I’m glad I’ve finally caught up with it. It’s not as good as his best flicks and not as bad as his worst, but it is as visually inventive and interesting as all of them.

This is the somewhat overstuffed turn-of-the-century tale of an aspiring writer (Mia Wasikowska) who is the daughter of a wealthy industrialist and finds herself seduced by a visiting inventor (Tom Hiddleston) who seeks to do business with her father. He’s got a creepy sister (Jessica Chastain) in tow, and when murder and marriage go down, our young heroine finds out the dubious duo reside in a sprawling, crumbling estate atop a mountain of red clay that seeps into the house as if the whole world is bleeding.

I say it’s overstuffed because the house is also haunted. Yes, the ghosts and hauntings shed light on the tragedies that have occurred in/around the house/sibling duo, and help our heroine figure out what’s going on, but they’re sort of ancillary to what’s essential a confidence plot, and if you’ve got ghosts in your movie they should never be ancillary.

I suppose one thing that sort of sidelines the ghosts is the fact that they’re all CGI, or if they’re not, they seem like they are, which you’d think would be a good technology to use to show see-through, floating beings but it’s not done well here and you end up with inconsequential cartoons flitting around. There’s a couple legit scares, don’t get me wrong, but they’re sort of in spite of the special effects, instead of because of them, and that’s a bummer, especially for such an otherwise visually sumptuous movie.

Horrorfest 2024: Stoker

Stoker
Written by Wentworth Miller
Directed by Park Chan-wook
Starring Mia Wasikowska, Matthew Goode, Nicole Kidman, Durmot Mulroney and Jacki Weaver
UK/USA, 2013

Here’s a classy quasi-remake of Hitchcock’s SHADOW OF A DOUBT in which the trouble with this Charlie (Matthew Goode) is… a mystery I’ll leave you to discover yourself.

Uncle Charlie enters the picture when his brother (Dermot Mulroney) dies on his 18-year-old niece’s (Mia Wasikowska). The niece loved her father but now faces life with her cold and emotionally abusive mother (Nicole Kidman). Charlie shows up for the funeral and just keeps staying, as he grows disturbingly close first with the mother and then with his niece. Soon the housekeeper has disappeared, a meddling aunt (Jacki Weaver) does the same, and all signs point to Charlie. But how and why?

At first, based on the settings and costumes, I figured this flick was a period piece, but as it unfolded it was clear it’s supposed to be contemporary. I guess if you’ve got a rich enough set of characters on a big enough estate everything starts to look period. But, that wasn’t all – the flick has a classy tone that gives it a timeless feel.

 

Horrorfest 2024: The Midnight Meat Train

The Midnight Meat Train
Written by Jeff Buhler
Based on the story by Clive Barker
Directed by Ryuhei Kitamura
Starring Bradley Cooper, Leslie Bibb, Vinnie Jones and Brooke Shields
USA, 2008

You might think a flick with a title like THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN would be anything but boring. In this case, you’d be wrong. What greater sin is there than a promising title that’s never really delivered on?

Don’t get me wrong. The movie does prominently feature a midnight meat train. So, in a literal sense, the title delivers. But I’m talking about the spirit of the title. This is a title that deserves no holds barred insane exploitation. And instead we get… well, I’m not really sure what.

The premise, like the title, is promising: Bradley Cooper stars as a photographer who wants to capture the gritty realism of the city and pushes the envelope further and further to do it. In his quest he begins to suspect a butcher who rides the subway at night is actually a serial killer, and starts following him around.

This leads to an increasingly strange set of revelations that take the movie’s climax to what should have been a delightfully twisted, fantastical ending, but it all falls flat. I’m not sure why. The cold cinematography? The slow pacing? The incredibly fake-looking CGI blood splatter? I love a good bad special effect here and there, but these ones really rob what should be viscerally disturbing scenes of any weight.

 

Horrorfest 2024: Ginger Snaps

Ginger Snaps
Written by Karen Walton
Directed by John Fawcett
Starring Emily Perkins, Katharine Isabelle, Kris Lemche and Mimi Rogers
Canada, 2001

When I worked at a video distributor in the early 2000s, GINGER SNAPS was legendary as the perfect example of a (basically) direct-to-video movie that became a huge hit on rental shelves, even though it had no publicity behind it and barely played in theaters. Maybe it was the box art. Maybe it was just the right place at the right time. Whatever it was, GINGER SNAPS was the B-movie all B-movies wanted to be in those final, slim-pickin’ days of home video rental.

Then TWILIGHT came along. As a result, I always assumed GINGER SNAPS was sort of a proto TWILIGHT – it was popular with, and about, teenage girls, and was about werewolves. I figured I was in for sort of a mash up of THE CRAFT and TWILIGHT, and I was wrong.

Turns out it’s about a girl named Ginger who snaps! So it’s not just a clever title. Ginger turns into a werewolf, bit by bit, and begins to enjoy her newly found murderous ways, as her more reserved sister is forced to come to terms with the fact that she’s going to have to stop all this from happening. And so, we march ever on to the final battle royale between sisters – the werewolf hunter, and the werewolf.

Even though this flick came out at a time when terrible CGI was a hallmark of DTV B flicks, GINGER SNAPS stays away from that, opting for pretty convincing makeup effects and practical creature work, making the most out of a pretty impressive werewolf puppet towards the end of the film, shooting around it in creative and clever ways to cover up its limitations.

Of course, the real story here is how the whole flick is an allegory for the traumatic adolescence of teen girls, but that goes without saying, right?

Horrorfest 2024: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2
Written by L.M. Kit Carson
Directed by Tobe Hooper
Starring Dennis Hopper, Carolina Williams and Jim Siedow
USA, 1986

I’ve seen THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE a million times and it never stops being good, so I figured, this year, why not finally check out the second one? I’ve always read that, while it’s way different from the original, it’s still interesting because it’s such a weird, dark comedy.

Unfortunately, when I hear “dark comedy” I kind of assume it’s going to be smart or funny. This one’s neither. So, if you focus on the comedy, and it’s not funny, and stay away from what made the original scary (the realism), you end up with… TEXAS CHAINSAW 2, I guess.

I knew we were in trouble in an early scene in which a radio station is infiltrated by Leatherface and his demented brother, who screams and bashes the engineer repeatedly to the point where I was checking my Fitbit and the time kept being the same.

Dennis Hopper’s on hand as a vengeful Texas Ranger, which is better than not having him on hand, but the movie spirals down into mostly taking place in fake-looking sets representing tunnels under an amusement park that Leatherface and his family now reside in.

I got so bored during the movie I decided to look up the location of the original TEXAS CHAINSAW house, only to find out that the house has been moved onto the property of a resort and is now a restaurant. That gave me an idea for a new sequel where exactly this happens, only Leatherface and his family come along for the ride.

Horrorfest 2024: The Wailing

The Wailing
Written and Directed by Na Hong-jin
Starring Kwak Do-won, Hwang Jung-min and Chun Woo-hee
South Korea, 2016

THE WAILING surprised me because I remembered all of the marketing making the film seem like it was going to be a long, depressing slog. But, it’s actually pretty funny, in parts. Sure, it deals with gory murders, but it’s all seen through the eyes of a schlubby and inept village police officer who means well but often jumps to the wrong conclusions and is crippled by fear. 

This is to the movie’s credit, though. It makes a movie with fantastic supernatural stuff in it seem more real, and takes a unique point of view. So many horror movies are meant to scare audiences but few of them feature characters who are appropriately frightened by the insane things they see.

It gets to the point where I’m not even sure the supernatural figures know who is wrong and who is right, who is evil and who isn’t. Which one’s the hunter and which one’s the hunted? What’s the difference? It’s rare a supernatural horror movie like this one exists in this kind of gray area, and it is refreshing.

I guess I’ve said a lot without saying much about the plot – maybe that’s for the best. I enjoyed not knowing what this movie was about or where it was going when I went into it, so maybe you will, too.

Horrorfest 2024: Hold Your Breath

Hold Your Breath
Written by Karrie Crouse
Directed by Karrie Crouse and Will Joines
Starring Sarah Paulson, Amiah Miller, Annaleigh Ashford and Ebon Moss-Bachrach
USA, 2024

This is the story of the people the stars of GRAPES OF WRATH left behind – set in 1930s Oklahoma, as the dust bowl landscape is as depressed as the economy, Sarah Paulson plays a mother of two who was once a mother of three, struggling to breathe in a world full of dust and live off of a cow who won’t give milk and is rapidly running out of hay to eat.

Paulson’s husband has gone on ahead and promises to send back for his family as soon as he can. Meanwhle, the apocalypse seems as if it is ever encroaching on the small community stranded in this wasteland.

Against this backdrop, it becomes unclear if a supernatural element is coming to visit, if it’s all the doing of a mysterious stranger who seems to have healing powers (Ebon Moss-Bachrach) or if it’s all in Paulson’s mind.

This sounds like the set up for a thriller that will keep you guessing. Unfortunately, it is so slow that it forgets to be suspenseful. The setting is a unique one for a horror film, and is well realized through photography and special effects, but the story just isn’t quite there yet. 

Horrorfest 2024: Lisa Frankenstein

Lisa Frankenstein
Written by Diablo Cody
Directed by Zelda Williams
Starring Kathryn Newton, Cole Sprouse, Liza Soberano and Carla Gugino
USA, 2024

Diablo Cody, screenwriter extraordinaire, returns to the horror genre with LISA FRANKENSTEIN, the timeless tale of a girl and her corpse. Firmly set in the early 90s, and loving every minute of it, this flick follows the fetching Kathryn Newton as the titular Lisa, a high schooler who lost her mom to tragedy and has gained a tragically awful stepmom.

One thing leads to another and before you know it, Lisa’s cemetery hangout is struck by lightning and the reanimated corpse of a turn-of-the-century hunk starts to do Lisa’s dirty work, first to her chagrin and then to her pleasure.

The laughs, gore and ingenuity escalate to their unavoidable conclusion as bodies go missing, body parts swap and a tanning bed is turned into a life-giving reanimation chamber. As usual, Cody actually seems to have something she wants to say here, and it’s probably spoken best in a scene in which even the nicest-seeming guy turns out to be a total creep. It’s no wonder Lisa has to dig deep to find love.

Horrorfest 2024: The Substance

The Substance
Written and Directed by Coralie Fargeat
Starring Demi Moore, Margaret Qualley and Dennis Quaid
France/UK/USA, 2024

Demi Moore reminds us why she’s the queen and Margaret Qualley continues her climb to the top with a heaping helping of body horror in THE SUBSTANCE.

Moore stars (and takes no prisoners) as a once-hot, now washed up actress relegated to hosting a jazzercise show on TV. In an effort to keep what she (and her pig boss, delightfully disgusting Dennis Quaid) perceives as her fading looks, Moore takes a mysterious and experimental drug (the titular substance) and finds herself violently reborn young again. With several strings attached.

Qualley stars as Moore’s younger self, and while she doesn’t quite show the raw emotional range Moore brings to the picture, she’s equally as bold with her body, turning in an unabashedly physical performance that has to be seen to be believed.

This is the kind of movie that starts out over the top and only continues to climb from there, ending in a spectacular splatter of insanity the likes of which you’ve never seen before and will never see coming.

Horrorfest 2024: The Invitation

The Invitation
Written by Phil Hay and Matt Manfredi
Directed by Karyn Kusama
Starring Logan Marshall-Green, Tammy Blanchard and Michiel Huisman
USA, 2015

You’re invited to one awkward night in the hills over Los Angeles in THE INVITATION, as an estranged, formerly married couple (whose union crumbled after the death of their kid) reunites for a murderously cringe-inducing dinner party.

This one’ll keep you guessing as we move from one rough party into what seems increasingly like a cult initiation. Who’s in on it? Who’s not? Is our hero crazy and just jumping to conclusions? Or is another Jonestown about to go down?

Turns out, things are even worse than you possibly imagined as a great final shot brings us the twist ending we didn’t know we needed, but definitely deserved.

The writers, director and cast make a lot out of a little with this limited cast and claustrophobic location. I was not surprised when I found out the confident hand behind this taut thriller also brought us indie darling GIRLFIGHT and the once reviled, now revered JENNIFER’S BODY. 

 

Horrorfest 2024: Magic

Magic
Written by William Goldman, based on his novel
Directed by Richard Attenborough
Starring Anthony Hopkins, Ann-Margret and Burgess Meredith
USA, 1978

Welcome to Horrorfest 2024, my 16th year of watching and reviewing 31 horror movies in the month of October in honor of Halloween. This year I took inspiration from horror movie Trivial Pursuit – every time I got a question for a movie I’d never seen, I wrote it down, and so my list was born, along with a few others just to round it out.

This year we start off with a pretty great, albeit seemingly forgotten, flick called MAGIC, a take on the possessed ventriloquist dummy micro-genre. Just watching the credits had me excited as name after prominent name popped up – here’s a flick written by William Goldman, directed by Richard Attenborough and starring Anthony Hopkins, Ann-Margret and Burgess Meredith. Add a score by Jerry Goldsmith to round things out and we’ve got a potential classic on our hands.

While the movie has its moments – many of them – ultimately it doesn’t hang together quite the way you want it to, and that’s probably why it isn’t remembered today as much as its pedigree suggests it should be. What ends up being a pretty simple plot is overly convoluted as Hopkins stars as a technically gifted magician who overcomes his terrible stage fright and lack of charisma by working through the gimmick of ventriloquism. On the eve of certain stardom, he torpedoes his own career out of some sense of fear or inferiority and retreats to a cabin in the woods where he attempts to romance his childhood crush (Ann-Margret).

This is a lot of extra framework just to get to the point where murders start happening and you start to suspect this guy (and his puppet) are insane. Once we get there, it’s pretty satisfying right up until a last shot that’s a bit of a head-scratcher. Still, this flick’s more than worth a watch if only for Hopkins’ unhinged performance, which is a sight to behold.