Monday, September 28, 2009

Movie theater reviews

I go to lots of movies in lots of theaters. Here are my thoughts on a variety of theaters in the Portland area, judging price, presentation, programming, eats/drinks and atmosphere on a scale of 1-4, 1 being the worst and 4 being the best.

BAGDAD THEATER AND PUB

PRICE: Good. 4/4
Tickets are cheap.

PRESENTATION: Pretty good. 2/4
You can't always be sure you'll get to see a film here. They've been known to show DVDs on the big screen and pass it off as a real movie. So, it's kind of hit and miss.

PROGRAMMING: Pretty good. 3/4
Usually just second run mainstream movies, but sometimes revivals of classics. Unfortunately, usually the revivals are tied to a radio station promotion or local club of some kind and they usually encourage rowdy audiences, so that can take away from the experience.

EATS AND DRINKS: Pretty good. 3/4
Pizza, popcorn, beer. This is a McMenamin's, so it's all just okay.

ATMOSPHERE: Great. 4/4
This is one of the most grand examples of a movie palace in Portland. A beautiful lobby and beautiful auditorium, designed in the Arabian nights fashion, as the name of the theater suggests.

CINEMA 21

PRICE: Pretty good. 2/4
They usually try to steer you in the direction of admitting you're a student, even if you're not. This place is cheaper than a first-run theater but more expensive than a lot of the second run theaters in town. There's no debit card machine, though, which sucks.

PRESENTATION: Good. 3/4
You can always rely in seeing honest-to-God films here, but the cavernous auditorium can make for an echo-filled viewing experience. Still, good visuals and good sound, even if the acoustics aren't so good.

PROGRAMMING: Great. 4/4
You'll be hard pressed to find another theater in Portland with such great classics, foreign films or indies. This place gets a lot of opening weekend exclusives, too, so sometimes it's the closest you can get to New York or LA without leaving Portland.

EATS AND DRINKS: Good. 3/4
Popcorn and candy. Also, coffee. And, just recently, beer. I used to say, "I wish Cinema 21 served beer." Now I don't have to say that anymore.

ATMOSPHERE: Good. 3/4
The place is a little run down, but it's a nice huge auditorium with a big screen and a balcony, so it does transport you back in time, a little bit.

HOLLYWOOD THEATRE

PRICE: Pretty good. 2/4
Again, more expensive than most second runs but less expensive than a first run theater. They have cheap tickets on Mondays, and you can buy a membership to get all kinds of deals.

PRESENTATION: Pretty good. 2/4
Again, depending on the way the studios choose to distribute their films to this theater, you may not end up seeing something on film. But I'd say 9 times out of 10, you will.

PROGRAMMING: Good. 3/4
This is almost great, but because this is a non-profit theater it ends up being a little eclectic. Usually it's a great selection of foreign, independent, classic and offbeat second-run films, but sometimes the films can be so offbeat that no one really wants to see them.

EATS AND DRINKS: Good. 3/4
Coffee, yes. Beer, no. On the bright side, the popcorn is the fluffiest stuff you're likely to see in Portland.

ATMOSPHERE: Good. 3/4

Again, could have been great, but this place is a little run down, I think mostly because they spend all their money on getting movies and none of it on keeping the place up. The outside architecture is great, and some of it remains on the inside, as well, but the place has been through some rough times and awkward remodels.

KENNEDY SCHOOL THEATER:

PRICE: Great. 4/4
Movies are nice and cheap.

PRESENTATION: Good. 3/4
You'll get your films on film, here, but they're projected in a cavernous gymnasium so chances are you won't have great acoustics.

PROGRAMMING: Pretty good. 2/4
This is mostly just a second-run theater, and it tends to veer towards childrens' and family films. But, occasionally they'll play something cool.

EATS AND DRINKS: Pretty good. 3/4
Again, it's a McMenamin's. So, there's middle-of-the-road pizza and beer.

ATMOSPHERE: Good. 3/4
As mentioned before, this theater is located in the gymnasium of what used to be an elementary school, so it's definitely unique. The seats are made up of mis-matched couches and arm chairs. On one hand this is nice and comfy. On the other, it's creepy to wonder what kind of shenanigans the cushions inspire in the dark.

LAURELHURST THEATER:

PRICE: Great. 4/4
Movies are $3.00.

PRESENTATION: Good. 3/4
Prints aren't always the best, but everything's on film.

PROGRAMMING: Great. 4/4
This is mostly a second-run theater but they always reserve one screen for a classic, and someone with great taste must be programming the classics because they're almost always awesome. On top of this, they tend to run both second-run mainstream films as well as second-run indies and foreign flicks, so it's half art-house and half second-run.

EATS AND DRINKS: Good. 3/4
Beer, pizza and popcorn. The pizza can be floppy and soggy but the beer selection is good.

ATMOSPHERE: Good. 3/4
The marquee outside is great. Inside you're greeted with an eclectic but usable decor.

MORELAND THEATER:

PRICE: Pretty good. 2/4
More expensive than most second-runs, but cheaper than a mainstream theater.

PRESENTATION: Good. 3/4
Nice big screen, one large auditorium, always good prints.

PROGRAMMING: Good. 3/4
For a one-screen, this place gets a lot of first-run movies. Problem is, they're stuck there for 3 weeks to a month, so you can't visit this place very often unless you want to see the same movie multiple times.

EATS AND DRINKS: Pretty good. 2/4
The usual: popcorn, candy and soda. No beer, no coffee, though they do look the other way if you want to bring something in from one of the nearby Starbucks.

ATMOSPHERE: Good. 3/4
This is another Arabian style movie palace. Stepping into the lobby and auditorium is almost like stepping back in time.

REGAL FOX TOWER STADIUM 10:

PRICE: Shitty. 1/4
These flicks are full price, so hopefully you have a coupon.

PRESENTATION: Good. 3/4
Great sound, good visuals, no complaints.

PROGRAMMING: Great. 4/4
This is one-stop-shopping for current arthouse flicks.

EATS AND DRINKS: Pretty good. 2/4
Usual movie theater fare.

ATMOSPHERE: Pretty good. 2/4
It's kind of cool how the theaters are built into a multi-story building where you have to ride the escalator to get up to the main lobby. But, each theater is pretty small and the modern architecture is cold and impersonal.

REGAL LLOYD CENTER STADIUM 10:

PRICE: Shitty. 1/4
Again, full price. Yuck.

PRESENTATION: Shitty. 1/4
Sound is spotty and they have a bad habit of running most of their projector bulbs very low. So you end up with a murky, mushy, gray picture. The people at the Lloyd can make a brand new print look like it has been dragged through the mud, and there's no excuse for it.

PROGRAMMING: Pretty good. 2/4
If you're looking for whatever mainstream, first-run hit has come out within the last few weeks, this is the place to look.

EATS AND DRINKS: Pretty good. 2/4
Standard movie theater stuff, though they tend to always be out of coffee.

ATMOSPHERE: Shitty. 1/4
You can tell you're at a mall movie theater when you're at this place. Big, empty, ugly. There are a couple gigantic screens, which are nice, since you don't see them much anymore these days, but the theater doesn't really take advantage of them. Oh, and I'm not sure why they call this place a "stadium." If I remember correctly, there's no stadium seating to be found.

ROSEWAY THEATRE:

PRICE: Good. 3/4
Cheaper than most first-runs, but more expensive than most second-runs.

PRESENTATION: Great. 4/4
State of the art sound and digital projection make this the best place to see a movie in Portland.

PROGRAMMING: Good. 3/4
This is a one-screen theater, so they're usually stuck with the same movie for weeks at a time, but they miraculously get whatever the coolest new movie is at any given time.

EATS AND DRINKS: Good. 3/4
No beer, and no coffee but the popcorn is as fluffy as the Hollywood Theatre's popcorn.

ATMOSPHERE: Good. 3/4
The best of both worlds: the feel of an old-school movie palace and the cleanliness of a brand new, state of the art theater. Curtains, stained glass windows, but also comfy chairs and good acoustics.














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